What happens with a deferred marathon? A whole lot of emotions and trying to figure out what’s next.
This is not the post I thought I’d be sharing today. Ordinarily, I jot down some thoughts on paper throughout the day before putting everything together and typing up a full post on WordPress. I had a two-pager all handwritten and ready to go. I thought the post I was going to be sharing was about my goal marathon and all the things I was going to do to pump myself up for it.
And then I deferred.
Yes, you read that right. I deferred my entry to the 43rd Marine Corps Marathon. And now I’m feeling the complete gamut of human emotion. On the one hand, I’m relieved. There was a lot of stress surrounding the race for me this year. Deferring lifted a huge weight almost instantaneously. But on the other hand, I’m really dejected. I had big plans for this year’s race. Heck, even my husband signed up for the 10K. It was going to be epic!
A Deferred Marathon: Now What?
This was obviously a hard decision. One that had been considered heavily for a week. And I know I made the right one. Am I heartbroken? Yes. But it’s for the best. Plus I deferred; I didn’t transfer. Which means I’ll be back in D.C. next year for the 44th Marine Corps Marathon!
What’s next?
After I officially deferred, I spent the remainder of the day swapping emails with my coach at lightning speed trying to decide what’s next for me. Right now I’m debating whether I should still tackle a full marathon in just a few short weeks or if I should perhaps dial back the distance and instead focus on speed. Same race — two different distances. There’s also the teensy tiniest possibilities of traveling for a full a month later but there would be a lot of planning to go into that so it’s not likely.
Running hard for 13.1 miles is super hard. I’m not sure if I’m ready to be uncomfortable for that long. But running 26.2 miles is just as hard, just in a much different way.
Am I ready for running hard for two hours straight? Or will I be satisfied with a longer and equally difficult race with a slower sustained pace?
My coach and I will surely continue the discussion over the next day or so, and hopefully I’ll come to a decision in which I’m both confident and comfortable.
And in the meantime, I’ve always got Iron Horse on the horizon!
Stay tuned!!
Let’s talk!
Have you ever deferred or bowed out of a huge goal race?
Which distance would you choose if you were me?
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44 Comments
Totally understand what you mean when you talk about feeling so many emotions. When I deferred the NYC Marathon I felt everything from disappointment to relief, but ultimately I had peace knowing that I made the right decision. Mentally I wasn’t anywhere near prepared and I knew that I would regret the experience if I tried to run the race
It was definitely a really hard decision. I think I made the right one. But now I’m struggling with a new goal.
What???!!!??? I apparently missed something recently. I’m bummed I won’t see you this year. Guess I’ll have to cheer you on next year since I need to take a break after this year.
Hope we can meet up at a different race between now and then.
You didn’t miss anything. I kept a lid on this for a week because I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. I’m bummed I won’t see you, too.
Let’s look at the calendar and see if we can meet up at a race!
I can understand feeling all the emotions! I had to put off a big golf tournament last month and felt the same as you. Immediate relief followed by sadness, regret, everything.
Yup, all the emotions!! It’s so tough.
It’s such a hard decision, but selfishly I’m relieved because I have a work event in Texas that weekend and so now I won’t miss seeing you. How’s that for a twisted effort at looking at the bright side? I need to decide if I’m going to do my September 30th 10 miler or not and start training for it ASAP. I’ve only done a few 6+ mile runs all summer and this one is all HILLS.
You would definitely be ready for 10 miles by Sept 30th, no doubt. Start training on some hills and you’ll be all good. Take Scooby!
I’m glad I get to see you next year!!
I know it was a difficult decision. I’ve had to make the same decision twice. The last time was for the 2013 Boston Marathon. I had to back out due to a back injury. I still went into Boston to cheer on my fellow team runners and was 2 miles from the start when the bombs went off. VERY mixed emotions about not running that one.
Oh wow. I can’t even imagine those emotions you must have surrounding that. Hugs.
Deferring a race can be such an emotional decision. I am sure that you made the decision that was best for you and that’s all that matters. I am bummed I won’t see you though. Hang in there girl everything will be ok 🙂
I know, I’m super bummed I won’t see you. But save the date for 2019 because I’ll be back. 🙂
I’ve deferred or DNS a number of marathons. I decided to defer CIM again this year so we could have a real vacation. It’s definitely a tough decision but if there was too much stress and drama, it’s the right choice!
You’re absolutely right. If there’s stress or drama, it’s not meant to be!!
Ah, Rachel, I know this was a tough decision. MCM was my big goal race for this year and while I know I deferred for all the right reasons it was still hard when the deferral became a reality. Selfishly I ‘m psyched I’ll get to see you next year!!
Hah! That’s true!! I didn’t even think of that. Yay for silver linings!! We’ll both reach our goals next year 🙂
It’s such a tough decision. I’m sure you made the right one for you. I’ve never had to defer but I have shortened the distance of a planned marathon because I knew I wasn’t ready. It really is so hard. So many emotions. But, you’ll be back!
So many emotions… gah!!! And the worst part is, I know how I would deal with it as a coach but as the athlete it’s WAY different.
Oh Rachel…..I know how difficult this had to be, after all you’re all about the MCM 😉 Maybe 2019 will (finally) be the year I opt in for the lottery and get there…maybe…
DUDE! YES! YOU JUST MADE MY WHOLE DAY!!! DO IT!!!!
Sounds like it was a tough decision but it sounds like the right one if it felt like it lightened the load immediately. Good luck with the next goal!
Thank you, Chaitali!
It’s never an easy decision. Even when it’s the right decision, it’s a big blow to the ego. I DNS’d a race in 2014 that I’d really been looking forward to, and couldn’t even walk it. You’ll come back stronger for it next year.
Definitely never an easy decision. Thank you!
This is my life this week! I have a marathon in 2 weeks, but I know I’m not ready to hit the expectations I’ve been driving toward all season. I just haven’t peaked yet. None of my workouts have given me confidence, and the summer has just been too soul-sucking hot/humid. I’m burnt out at the wrong time. I’m in the same predicament. Do I train for a few more weeks and tackle 26.2 or do I push my limits on a half when I don’t want to run that hard? I think I just mentally don’t want to push hard anymore and my heart is no longer in it. I’ll give it a few more days…Thanks for the post!
Oh girl, I’m so sorry to hear you’re in this predicament! If you can cover the distance for the full, might as well go for it. Unless you have a hefty goal and don’t feel it’s within reach. It sounds like you don’t want to run a half very hard. You’ll come to a decision soon.
Bowing out of any race is seriously a stressful decision! Although if you are honoring your body by dropping out then I don’t see any issue. Sometimes things happen that are beyond our control and sometimes the timing is just not right. Depending on your training, I would take a chance on a fast half marathon. It sounds like you have base built and you’re comfortable with the distance. A few tweaks with speed and you may be able to knock it out of the park!
The timing was definitely not right. We’ll see what the next few weeks hold. I hope I’m less bitter about it soon. 😉
I bet that was a hard decision.
To me running a full marathon in unthinkable. Such a huge time and physical commitment. It impacts not only you but your family.
I have never DNSed a big race but then again I have never registered for a full.
I agree with you. 13.1 is tough enough.
It is something to be proud of.
Looking forward to hearing about your next steps.
Thanks, Darlene. I don’t mind the training and time commitment to be honest. It’s my “me” time that I need away from my family, and they understand that. Instead of going out for dinner/drinks in the evening with friends, I run for a few hours and grab brunch. 🙂
13.1 sure is tough!
You will be happy that you will be in better condition to enjoy the race next year.
I bowed out of Big Sur marathon and to tell you the truth it was a relief!
My deferral is half relief, half grief. Lol! I’ll make peace with it eventually.
I know this was a hard decision for you! Luckily MCM lets you defer. With Grandma’s, I had to DNS. Still, both are better than DNF. Next year will be different!
That stinks you couldn’t defer for Grandma’s. That was a wonderful race. I’ll definitely go back for that one. Meet me there! <3
In the end only you know what’s right for your body. I’m sorry you had to defer — I’ve come really close to that a few times, always due to family issues (and why I look for races that can be deferred), but I haven’t had to do it. Yet.
In fact, I came real close to deferring ID. Kind of glad I didn’t since that race will never be “run” again — OTOH, what a fiasco it was!
I also believe things happen for a reason. It’s hard to see in the moment, but hopefully there are bigger & better things out there for you!
I’m glad you didn’t defer ID!
They do happen for a reason, you’re absolutely right. It’s still hard when you have such a big goal and then it’s gone. I’m left wondering what to do with my life… 😉
Deferring or DNS’ing is tough! I’m sorry you had to do that. It sounds like you made the right decision though, since you feel like a huge weight has been lifted! I’m sure in the next few days the sting will subside and you will start to feel better. I never deferred anything because all the times I couldn’t run a race, there was no deferment, just ate the cost. So I have dns’ed a couple times. It was always the right decision though, so I don’t regret it. Hang tough, girl!
I’ve DNSed a few times myself. The last one was Rock n Roll Chicago because that city is so damn expensive! 😉
I hope the sting goes away soon…
I’m sure your decision to defer was in the best interest of your life at this time. There are always more races so don’t feel bad.
I’m struggling with my training for my upcoming marathon and hope I too won’t have to defer. Sometimes runners put a lot of unnecessary stress on themselves…physically and emotionally.
I think if you’re struggling with your training and your heart’s not in it, it’s best to defer. You have to really want a marathon to get it, as I’m sure you already know.
You’re right, there are always more races. It still stings, though.
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